OMG !!!!

A little over a week ago I "celebrated" my 50th Birthday.OMG !!! Not because I turn 50 but all the comments and the reactions......People, I turned 50. I am not stepping over to the other side. Life is not over. Not by far. It reminds me of my 20s when I get comments like "but you are married!" It did not stop me from pursuing an challenging career, sometimes travel alone or admiring a good looking guy who was not my husband. Ha, ha, like I say to this day, I am married not dead!!( I am still married almost 25 years later). Now, I say I am 50 and enjoying life.





I am just amused by people's reaction. I think more often than not when they are wishing me Happy Birthday, they are thinking of a bit about themselves. I am not saying they are not sincere in their best wishes for me but they are tinged with their own feeling about growing old. Often, it was followed by how they felt when they turn 50 or whatever birthday had passed. Many tell me how they felt depressed and worry about upcoming birthdays. They ask me how I feel but no matter that I say I am happy, I see it in their eyes, hear it on their voices. They think it cannot be, they are perplex why I don't feel depressed or at least a bit sad. I must be lying! They continue the conversation with," but don't you.....this and that?" 


How do I feel? I am happy! It was just another special day, not to belittle the event but it was not life changing. It was a marker on life's journey. I do not feel sad but instead contended and maybe a little proud to be 50. I am enjoying my current life and have no regrets. It is not how I envisioned it would be growing up but that does not make it better or less. It just is. It is good. It helps that I have good health ( I think!), a loving husband (?), two wonderful children (for public consumption) and a good relationship with my siblings and mom. One regret is my dad who passed away a few years ago. I wished he was still alive so I could share this exciting phase of my life with him. I celebrated my birthday by calling my Mother around the time I would have been born 50 years ago. She deserve a lot of credit for the person I am today.


Don't get me wrong. It was a special day. It was wonderful to be remembered on that day and to know how many people care about me. However, I do not view it as an end to life style and a beginning of a decline. I did not suddenly become old overnight. Ha,ha..I guess it helps that I look a little younger than my age, I have been told. I am as vain as the next person!! Maybe when the reflection in the mirror starts to scare me, birthdays will affect me more. Right now, I am proud to be 50.


The good thing about growing older is you know what you want or don't want. I did not want a party- not a party person. I just wanted to spend time with my love ones and spend a little time in my garden, pottering around. It is a very special place to me. My husband built me some raised planting beds and purchase tropical fruit trees for my birthday 3 years ago. So I did just that, a little play time in my sand box, what my husband calls my Eden. A lovely lunch at Sadaf (Persian restaurant downtown San Diego) with my husband followed by a bonus shopping trip to my favorite plant nursery. Chocolates and a sweet birthday card, promising A (s) in his studies! Now, that's a boy who knows his mommy. Ha, ha.  As soon as my busy son was done with his day, I  had a birthday dinner with my two men at Southcoast Grill ( A southern/ cajun restaurant at Hillcrest). Loads of good food. Yum. Almost perfect......it is the first birthday I spent apart from my daughter since she was born. Even that has a proud element with her being in UC Berkeley earning her degree. See- all happy!


I am excited about the life I have now and ahead of me. I feel so fortunate to be in a era that age does not have to slow you down. It is a matter of choice. I am enjoying trying to keep up technological advances with computers and the internet. Who would have thought I would be blogging? I must say I have not bought into tweeting. Cannot believe that there are people who want to hear from me every minute!!! At the same time, I enjoying old fashion activities like gardening, jewelry making, scrapbooking and cooking, often made better by computers and the internet. I love keeping in touch with what interest that my children and their cousins and sometimes finding that I like it as much as they do!!. 


I am just growing older, hopefully better. Check back next year..... I might be singing a different song. Ha, ha....Not if I can help it. So for now, OMG I AM 50!!